Tuesday, July 14, 2009


There are some moments when you worry about your mouth hanging open for so long, there's a good possibility of drooling on your own shirt. Today was one of those days.

Many moons ago, I waxed lyrical about the mother of mine and Mr. DD's goddaughter, who is practically a baby herself at 23 (this is not to say that there are not perfectly mature 23 year olds out there, but when I was 23, I thought that running naked across a soccer field at 3 am made me REALLY COOL, so maybe that just puts the whole issue to rest right there.) and one of those people who honestly just reacts to stimulus rather than thinking deeply into anything. This is not to say that she is a bad person. She is a young person who has had a very, very easy ride and will continue to do so.

I took the Prawn over to play with said goddaughter who is a little over half a year older than she is. While they were in a bedroom wrecking havoc, The Barmaid and I chatted about not particularly challenging issues, but finally we did come round to "so, you guys thinking of having another one?"

"Well," I said, "I actually WAS pregnant earlier this year, but I miscarried in March. I went to the hospital for a surgical option."

"Oh my god!" she said, leaning in conspiritorially, "Surgery is so WEIRD! I've had two abortions since I've been with *insert name of current boyfriend*!"

The thing is, I would have expected to become enraged or emotional at this idea that somehow having a surgical solution to a miscarriage and oh, HAVING A FUCKING ABORTION were in any way similar, but somehow, it really just washed right over me. It was rather like hearing a two year old say the word "cocksucker" because they figured out how to use the remote and had been watching "Die Hard" for the last few hours. I knew that it honestly didn't occur to her that this might be in some way an innapropriate comparison to make.

"Oh." I said. "Did you skip a pill or something?"

"No. We just weren't using anything."


I need a drink.


Brandy said...

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. Seriously.

abcgirl said...

wow. just ... wow.

Molly said...

So those "we're using abortion as birth control" people actually do exist. And, it appears, you know them.

Well isn't that a kick in the face?


Anonymous said...

I was going to say what Molly said.

Was the first abortion so easy that it didn't at least prompt her to buy some condoms?


noela said...

Um. Wow. Just....Wow. And, really, really, REALLY not in a good way.

I'm flummoxed that it just "washed over you", as you said....and that you didn't bitchslap her in the face right then and there!

That's....just one of the most horrendous things I've ever heard.

I'm sorry you actually know this person, for what that's worth.

Thinking of you,


Hopeful Mother said...

Yuck. I think I feel a little sick reading this, so I can only imagine how you were/are feeling.

Dr. Grumbles said...